“Let yourself be open and life will be easier. A spoon of salt in a glass of water makes the water undrinkable. A spoon of salt in a lake is almost unnoticed.”

-Buddha

“Be like melting snow -- wash yourself of yourself.”

― Rumi

Preservation Ale Square Dance....

Last Saturday night there was a fundraiser at Sulphur Creek Farms. My friends grew the organic hops & a local brewery (Yazoo) made a special ale with their hops called the Bells Bend Preservation Ale. There was also a bluegrass band and a square dance caller. It was good fun. As I was walking back to my car (around 4:30am), my friend all of a sudden dropped to the ground. I knelt down beside him and asked him what was wrong. His eyes were wide and he said, "I've heard folklore about this, but I've never seen it with my own eyes." I followed his gaze. There, in the grass, were lights. Not lightning bugs, but the strangest, most beautiful glow....like stars in the grass. He explained that it was something called foxfire and it is rare to ever see it. (Another birthday gift from the universe?) We sat there with our legs crossed like little kids and talked and watched the magical foxfire until the sun came up and the foxfire disappeared. I hope I'm always able to feel that kind of awe....even if I am thirty.

Skip forward a few days to this past Friday....

Skip forward a few days to this past Friday? Jeesh, that sounds confusing. You know what I mean.

My friends Samantha and Mikey threw me the best birthday party a girl could ask for. I was a wee bit nervous about having a party to begin with, because I had this fear that no one would show up and then I'd feel like a loser. Turns out, people did show up....thank goodness. I got nervous again though once people started showing up, because I realized most of these people knew me, but didn't know each other. Five minutes later, I looked around and saw that it didn't matter....they were all having a great time and off having amazing conversations. It was pretty wonderful to be standing there in the middle of all of these amazing people I love and have them all in one place for a night. Lots of people exchanged contact info. There was a wacky photo booth and a fire pit (that I had no desire to jump over after plenty of fire jumping at the Warrior Dash of the previous weekend). A crowd of awesome kids helped me blow out my birthday candles. I would tell you my wish, but then it won't come true :) It was a lovely evening.

Woke up in the morning to people sleeping in their cars, cots set up out by the fire, people asleep on the couches and floor. Pancakes & mimosas for breakfast, then I was off to the farmer's market, lunch with Ayesha and home for a nap before the square dance shindig fundraiser at Sulphur Creek Farms. That's a whole other post though. Here are a few photo gems from the photo booth. I'll have a few more to post tomorrow from another friend's camera.

The birthday celebration continued....

I got a text Sunday morning from my best friend to meet her at an address in Louisville. I love a good adventure, and I love the chance to spend time with Rae even more. (She lives in California, which makes hanging out a little harder than it used to be when we were sixteen and lived about ten miles from each other. Luckily, her husband's best friend was getting married last weekend, so they flew to Indiana.) I packed an overnight bag and took off for Kentucky to meet her halfway. I got lost in downtown Louisville, but eventually made it to the address. It was a beautiful little bed and breakfast in an old victorian mansion. Rae showed me our room and then we sat out on the back porch and had a glass of white wine. I can't tell you how much my heart needed to land right there. I haven't seen Rae since Jonathan moved out. We talk on the phone, but it isn't the same. I think there was a part of me that had processed a ton and taken huge steps forward, and a part of me that had been holding my breath for six months to be able to just sigh and admit to her how hurt I really am.

We walked to dinner, and then came back to the room, put on big terry cloth robes, had another glass of wine, ate chocolate, talked more and watched a movie. I fell asleep around 11pm, slept like a log and and woke up about 11:30am. We both commented on how rested and refreshed we felt. I didn't realize how exhausted I was. The owners of the B&B were so sweet, and even though breakfast had been served hours earlier, they offered to reheat our breakfast for us....spiced pears with raspberries, some amazing quiche I can't even explain, and fresh apple cider (see photos). After we finished breakfast, we walked around town and kept talking until she had to head back to Indy.

I'd be lying if I said I didn't have a good cry after she drove away. I'm so grateful for that wonderful day, but I know it will be quite a while until I get to see my friend again. I wish going out for coffee was something we could do whenever we felt like it. I've been thinking lately that I might be ready to move within the next year. California maybe? Why not stop complaining about them being so far away & do something about closing that distance? I think I just might.