Okay Okay

For the first few months I lived in Tucson, I used to walk Gus past this yoga studio near my house. I kept thinking, "I should really start doing yoga again." Every single time, I would convince myself that I needed to stretch and do some yoga at home first so I would be in better shape and more flexible before going to the classes. I didn't want to embarrass myself, but I also never actually did anything once I got home.

One day on my regular loop, I noticed a sign on the front door of the yoga studio. It said, "STOP MAKING EXCUSES. SHOW UP TO THE NEXT CLASS!" I almost fell over. I'm sure the sign wasn't written specifically for me, but it sure felt like it. I walked Gus home and went to a class that evening. That first class was insanely hard, but there was something so wonderfully humbling about how exhausted I felt at the end, and how proud I was of myself for actually showing up. I ended up working at that studio while I lived there, and at one point was seriously considering going through all of the training to become a yoga instructor. I loved that for 90 minutes out of the day, it was just me and a pink yoga mat.....and a room full of other sweating people, but you know what I mean. I didn't think about the things happening outside of that room, work, relationships, etc. I just focused on individual muscles, breathing, moving. Yoga transformed my body, but the biggest change I noticed was that I was much better at staying calm in the middle of stressful situations.

Fast forward to today. I have wished on more than one occasion in the past few years that I had never stopped practicing yoga, and that there was a button I could press to get back to that point. There isn't. I've made so many excuses. I used money, a busy schedule...and yes, again, not being flexible enough, all as excuses to not show up with my mat. About a month ago I went to a yoga class. It felt amazing. As I gathered my shoes, I almost started crying. The people around me had no idea how huge of a step I had just taken or exactly how long it had been. What I felt was pure relief. I went to another one a few days later. I felt inspired. Then, I don't know what happened. I guess I grabbed some old, familiar excuses and stopped showing up again. 12 weeks to 30 & today I'm going to stop making excuses and show up. 2:30 Kali Yuga Yoga in East Nashville....and I'm going to continue showing up.